Random Interviews
by xXSee.No.EvilXx
Summary: Retarded, makes little-to-no sence, but fun to read! Interviews from Death Note, Bleach, Fruits Basket and many more! Requests and Reviews are appriciated! .... Rated T for language ....
1. Light Yagami

**L0L, this is just something stupid and gaytarded my twin and I made up about a year ago. It used to be on Quizillia… you know, to tell you the truth, I don't know if it's still there or not… haven't really been on there is AGES! Well, just a collection of random interviews. Idk how many will be posted… however many we feel the need to.**

**For the record, I'm Aya and my twin is Ai (I know it can be a bit confusing sometimes, but… deal.**

X.x.X.x.X.x.X.x.X

Aya: WELCOME! I'm Aya and this *points to random person to her left* is Ai… Say hello Ai.

Ai: HELLO PEOPLE THAT I DON'T KNOW

People: HELLO AI!

Aya: Anywho, Today's first guest is *reads paper* … damn it…

Ai: WHO IS IT? I WANT TO KNOW! *takes paper from Aya*… SHIT! IT'S KI-er-um-Light Yagami

*Light walks on stage**everyone boo's… except the rabid fangirls… they're being held back by our awesome purple llama security guards*

Ai: So, Light…. Are you the god of the new world yet? *said sarcastically*

Aya:Ooooooh, buuuuurn!

Light: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Aya:DO YOU HAVE A BLACK NOTEBOOK? DO YOU KNOW ANYBODY WHO LIKES APPLES? IS YOUR LAST NAME NOT NOT NOT IM A GAY?

Light: What? No…

Ai:HAHA! SO YOU ARE GAY WITH L!

Light:I never said- that's not funny

Ai: *turns to fangirls* Sorry girls, he prefers penis.

Random Fanboy: I LOVE YOU, LIGHT! *passes out*

Aya/Ai:Um… okay then.

Ai:*turns back* DO YOU EAT SPARKLEY POATOE CHIPS?

Light: This is pointless, can I leave?

Aya:No…

Light: Why not?

Aya: 'CAUSE I'M THE FUCK'N POPE, BITCH! AND WHAT I SAY GOES!

Ai: ^.^

Light:0.o *slowly tiptoes away*

Ai: *pulls out gun* SIT YOUR ASS DOWN!

Light:*runs*

Ai:*shoots feet, ties him to his chair upside-down, then slaps him silly with a gold fish named Norman* HA, WTF NOW, BITCH?!

Aya:0.o… That's a bit… much… isn't it?

Ai:*glances at light* nope ^.^

Light:*slurs speech* ihhh wansdkfasa goa nowassda

Aya: SPEAK ENGLISH!

Ai:We're Japanese…

Aya:THEN SPEAK JAPANESE, DAMNIT! *slaps Light with Norman*

Ai:YES! OR I'LL KILL JOO DED WIT MEH EVIL COCOLATE CHIP COOKIE OF DOOM!

Aya: And destruction

Ai:Yes, that too *holds up cookie like it's the Holy Grail or sumthin*

Aya:Where'd you get that?

Ai:I… Don't really know?

Light: *voice still a little slur-ish* Can I go now, the blood is rushing to my head…

Ai:SHUT UP AND STOP COMPLAINING, IMAGAY! OR MY GOOKIE WILL EAT YOU! *holds up cookie again*

Cookie: *sparkle*

Ai:*looks at cookie* I'mma names you Beckensale…

Aya/Light: Ftw? 0.o

Aya: *looks at Light* NOW WHO THE FUCK SAID YOU COULD TALK? *throws random pear at- um- a very inappropriate spot*

Light: X.X

Ai: … did you kill him?

Aya:Nah… you wanna go get ice-cream?

Ai:YES! Can Beckensale come too?

Aya: ^.^ Yes, yes he can.

*walks off randomly leaving light to wallow in pain and self-pity*

X.x.X.x.X.x.X.x.X

**L0L, that gets stupider every time I read it XP**

**Clicky the review button please ^.^ you can request interviews as well (Please do!). We prefer to use **_**over-used anime such as Death Note, Bleach, Naruto, Fruits Basket, Code Geass, etc. (more fun**_** to poke fun at ^.^)**


	2. Ichigo Kurosaki

Aya: "WELCOME! WE IZ BAAAAACK!"

Ai: "in Black *AC/DC voice* nuh, nununuh, nununuh, NUH NUH NUNUNU!"

Aya: "STFU Ai"

Ai: "Aye Aye Capitan" *salute*

Aya: "OH MY GOD! SHUT THE FUNKY CHICKEN UP OR I'LL SHANK YOU WITH THIS CARROT!" *holds up carrot*

Ai: *thumbs up *

Aya: "ANNYYWWAAAYY! Today, we're gonna interview Ichigo Kurosaki!"

*Ichigo walks on stage* *cue the crickets*

Ichigo: "What's up with the silence?"

Ai: "Let's face it, Strawberry-kun. The show isn't about you anymore. No one cares what Kurosaki does. It's Aizen's show now"

Aya: "True, true, so very true. DID I SAY YOU COULD SPEAK?"

Ai: "SHUT UP AYA, I RUN THIS SHOW TOO!"

Ichigo: "Hey, I thought this was MY interview"

Aya: "ME, ME, ME, ME, ME! NO WONDER RUKIA DOESN'T LIKE YOU!"

Crowd: "ooooooh, buuuurn."

Ai: *random happy mood* "Alrighty, let's get on with the first question, shall we?"

Ichigo: "…okay"

Aya: "so how do you feel about Toushiro liking your little sis"

Ai: "Karin… and... Toushiro… THAT'S SO KAWAII!"

Ichigo: "wha…..tha-"

Aya: "SHUT UP FOO!"

Ichigo: "bu-"

Ai: "ICHIGO SHUT UP THIS AINT BOUT YOU!"

Aya: "Question two, shall we?"

Ai: "we shall."

Aya: *sings* "I USED. MY CHINESE STAR. TO PICK THE LOCKS. AND STEAL YOUR CAR!"

Ichigo: "What?"

Ai: "What?"

Aya: "In the butt?"

Ichigo: O.o

Ai: LMAO

Aya: "Oh, right. The question."

*purple llama runs past Mavis, the camera operator.*

Mavis: "RUN! RUN FREE! I WILL HELP YOU ESCAPE!" *runs after llama*

Ichigo: "Wow, I've seen some weird things, and that has got to take the cake."

Ai: "OH MY BUDDHA! THERE'S CAKE?"

Aya: "WHERE IS THIS CAKE OF WHICH YOU SPEAK OF?"

Ichigo: *sighs* "This is pointless and a complete waste of my time, can I leave please?"

Aya: "Why do all of our guests want to leave?"

Ai: *shrugs*

Aya: "So, Ichigo, how's your man-crush with Renji going?"

Ichigo/Ai: "WHAT?"

Ai: *points at Ichigo accusingly* "HOW DARE YOU CRUSH ON MY MAN! KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF!"

Ichigo: "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I HATE THAT STUPID MONKEY!"

Ai: *evil glare* "YOU SON OF A-"

**------- We're sorry, due to the current rating system we are not allowed to show you this section of the program. We will now skip to the rest of the interview------- **

Ichigo: *half-way unconscious, slumped over in chair*

Aya: "Hm, how will we ask questions now that he can't answer?"

*Renji walks on stage**small group of people cheer**Ai glares**crowed gets quiet*

Aya: "why him? I'm pretty sure we could just end it now and go for some ice cream"

Ai: "ice cream….chocolate… Renji... that's hot but the times not up"

Renji: "why did you want me here?"

Aya: "''cause Ai here has a huge cru-"

Ai: "AYA!......'case we thought that you would tell us about the time Ichigo raped you in the school hall way….BUT ice cream sounds better."

Renji: "what's ice cream"

Aya: O.o

Ai: "Stupid but hot…well at least he's not like Kon."

Aya: "Thank Marilyn Manson for that!"

Renji: "Who's Marilyn Manson?"

Aya/Ai: "GOD!"

Renji: "Okay, then."

Aya: "Ai, I'll let you take Renji to get some ice cream if Shuuhei gets to come too!"

Ai: "bu-" *thinks**shifty eyes* "ALRIGHTY! LET'S GO GET SOME ICE CREAM!"

Aya: "YEY!"

Ai: "BUT NO SAKE!"

Aya/Renji: *mutter* "damn"

Ichigo: "h-hey. Wha' 'bout meh?"

Aya: "We'll bring you back a strawberry!"

Ai: "LET'S GOOOOOO!" *randomly starts flying around and out the window*

Aya: "Can we just walk?"

Renji: "Yeah, I vote on walking" *walks off after Ai*

Aya: "ALRIGHT! THAT'S IT FOR TODAY! WE ONLY GOT LIKE TWO QUESTIONS IN, AND BARELY ANSWERES, BUT NO ONE CARES!"

*Gin randomly appears on stage* *curtains start to close*

Gin: "Bye Bye!"


End file.
